Wednesday, 30 March 2011

Nkazi my girl,why did you have to say good bye before you said hello.My heart cannot bear this my baby,I am trying but everyday I think of you and it takes me back to the 10\02 when you were pronounced dead.I want you back so badly,I want to hold you and see that beautiful face,I bet you had a beautiful smile just like your sister.How can my life be the same when now I am an angel mom?You are now part of the angels.My beautiful Nkazimulo my dreams are shattered,my life bitter,feeling like I have failed you,I didn't pray enough to save you from the schemes of the devil.The devil stole you from me to see me miserable and bitter but Nkazimulo both you and mommy are the children of the living God.He took the Israelites from Egypt,the land of slavery,He will surely take mommy out of this misery and place you in His dwelling place where you will be filled with His unconditional love and peace.We cannot allow to be defeated for we serve Jehovha Sabaoth who is Greater in His battles and my baby people won't go unpunished for robbing you of the life that you could have lived,for the love and warmth that was waiting for you here on earth,the joy that you were going to bring oh my poor child little did we know that you will be an angel the minute you arrive.

I was robbed of the joy of motherhood,to rock you and lullaby you,the night shift,the diaper changing,the breast feeding,to see all your baby's growth developments,oh my angel.At times I just speak in my heart that come back to mommy and live your life to the fullest.I cannot explain to anyone how this pain feels cause it is not explainable.I bonded with you,nartured you when you were still being knitted perfectly in my womb,that's why you were so beautiful,indeed you were fearfully and wonderfully made but to be an angel.Nkazimulo mommy loves you with all of her heart and wishes there would be a miracle and you'd come back to me and daddy.We want you back,heaven knows that.Be a victor wherever you are,win the race and mommy will also fight to be a victor not a victim.

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