One step forward

Oh my word I don't believe that yesterday husby actually opened up and we had a conversation about Tshami.Things are looking up indeed there is light at the end of the tunnel.The way he was so anti-this-topic I thought he was one day gonna crash& break down.It is indeed a step forward that we talked about her,about the cause of her death and what precautions we can take next time,things that drs do not tell you about.Yesterday I spent the whole day researching on google and what I found out was heart soothing(in a sense that I know next time it could be prevented and it is good as a patient to know and tell the drs what they can do to help you) but heart breaking as well.I never thought I can have a high risk pregnancy but after this thats what I have become but either way it is good to be monitored than for a person to just take my money without doing a proper job(that's how I feel).

Since my daughter loves talking about her little sister,I have decided that I won't be harsh and show no interest to her but rather I will support her so from sunday we have developed this habit of saying goodnight and sending our love to Tshami before we sleep and I can see from her face that it lights up everytime we send our love and kisses to her little sister and I think in that way she grow up having a better understanding that even when we don't see our loved ones we carry them in our hearts forever.

So we all have taken that one step forward to our healing process and it helps alot and revives.The first few weeks I hated a person who will say,time heals and today I see that indeed it heals.Some may say it is too early to say that but I say it is way overdue,I do not need to stay in sorrow for long the bible says joy cometh in the morning.This is the week for her estimated date of delivery I just don't know how it will be as the week progress but I am trusting in God to see me through