Anyone reading this post please tell me what will you make of this story,I think sometimes I am paranoid and my mind tells me things.A friend of mine was sharing with me a story of her friend who gave birth 3 months ago,she shared this story with emphasis that's what made me scrutinise every detail.Apparently this friend gave birth via C-Section to a baby that was without breath nor heart beat,the nurses were preparing to take the baby to the mogue when the gynae advised the mom and her mom who was in the delivery room to pray earnestly,after 30 minutes of prayer the child came back to life.I was so happy to hear that the child is alive and healthy and just couldn't held back my joy even if I wanted to but what ticked me off is the repetation of this story.

Which made me to really sit down and ask myself what exactly was my friend communicating to me,is she trying to say that I should have prayed even harder for my child maybe I will also be bearing this testimony?Or is she saying that I took the child to the mogue quickly.All sorts of questions which I am not getting an answer to is running in my head.I spent an hour with my daughter praying for her and pastor interceding on our behalf,but God's will was done at the end of the day.Deep down in my heart I could have even sacrificed my life if asked just for my baby to be alive.I wanted that child alive just like every mother.Maybe I am misinterpriting her emphasis,maybe I am too sensitive at times but from where I see this there is more to her emphasis than what I think.Either way I have come to know that only God is the giver of life,no one else,children only comes through us not from us.

Either way I have decided not to retaliate when she tells me this story again and again I will try to keep my cool.

Nkazimulo my baby,only if I had powers you will be here with mommy.We all miss you so much.We love you my princess